5 Radical Big Ten Predictions

It's that wonderful time of year when every fan has on those rose-colored glasses about their teams shot at a great season. I mean, every team is undefeated right now. Practices are going strong (unless you're Justin Boren), teams are looking good, and coaches are saying all the right things about progress and conditioning. The media machine and bloggers, including me, are all glowing about how 8, 9, 10, 12 wins are not only possible, but almost a guarantee.

Ah, yes...it's August in college football-land.

So what better time than for us to make some radical...nay...incredibly crazy-stupid predictions for Michigan and some teams in the Big Ten. I'm absolutely terrible at making predictions, but I figure if I make enough stupid ones, I should be able to nail one or two of them.

1) Michigan will be 4-0 at the end of September.
Sure, those rose-colored glasses fit me quite well. How can this happen? Well, let's say we beat WMU in week 1. ND comes calling in week 2, we play unusually well against ND at home...and we'll have momentum from being 1-0 for the first time in 3 years...so I'll call that a victory.

We have EMU and Indiana in weeks 3 and 4...they should be pushovers. Blam! 4-0!

2) tOSU will beat USC on Sept. 12th.
I'm going to be in my friend's wedding on that day. Many if not all of all of his other groomsmen are either tOSU grads or just fans-by-association. No way I stand next to those fellas all day and then have the unusual fortune of being able to rub another tOSU loss to USC in their face. The college football Gods don't love me that much.

3) Michigan State will end September 1-3.
Montana State as the opener will not be able to prepare little brother for Central Michigan the next week. CMU may be a MAC team, but they might just be the best of the rest in 2009. Call them Hawaii or Utah or Boise State...CMU is going to go the distance this season. At Notre Dame and at Wisconsin to wrap up the month sucks for sparty.

4) Penn State loses all of their away games.
They only play 4 games away from the Beav this year...at Illinois, Michigan, NU, and little brother. All three teams have the potential to have a successful season. I'm not convinced that Penn State has the firepower to light up the conference they way they did last year. If they come unraveled early, say against Iowa at home on 9/26, that could spell doom for their ability to pick up the shattered pieces of another season of "almost". Their non-conf schedule is a complete joke...no one will test them enough for a tougher than usual Big Ten slate.

5) Bret Bielema totally loses it during a post-game presser.
This one is just purely for me. I think this guy is due for a meltdown. Dantonio is seemingly the most likely candidate to light up a reporter after a tough loss...but Bielema seems like he just buries his anger way down deep...just waiting for the right time to unleash it on some unsuspecting beat writer.

1 comment

  1. Great post. I hear some of the groomsman are fans of the other "sparty" by association, if anything...not necessarily the bucks. (CWRU Sparty, that is!)